“You may just want to buy this painting,” he said, pulling the oversized canvas out from under the stairs. “I’m more of a white witch,” I replied, making a Wizard of Oz reference that made his wife chuckle. He stood there with the painting, which was beautiful, dark, and stormy. It had been part of his life for years, originating from a previous relationship. It had been languishing in a long-forgotten basement storage, waiting to be appreciated again. I only had a few minutes to look at it, but my mind raced as I considered how and where to honor this piece.

This painting, with its fire energy and the mysteries of the owl, did not belong in a closet.

An owl was the main character, its wings blurred as it carried the weight of its next meal, freshly entangled in its grasp. Trees flanked both sides, giving way to the unknown beyond. I saw its magic and pure potential.

Our homes carry the stories of our past—past relationships, adventures, and memories are all woven into the fabric of who we have become. Sometimes we realize that what we have no longer defines the person we are. Other times, we outgrow our art as we make room for families or new relationships.

We may move on, but sometimes our art stays with us. Whether for investment purposes, heirlooms, sentimental reasons, or simply for the sake of art, we find ourselves living with pieces that just don’t fit.

So, what now?

Before tossing something into the depths of storage, it's valuable to have a conversation about it, to speak to it, name the story, and honor the process. The more we know about our partners and their pasts, the better we can align with a new vision of what we are trying to create together.

Honor The Art Through Heartfelt Conversation

By honoring the past, we pave the way for a fresher, more grounded future. If the art has a specific meaning or tells a story to you, it’s beneficial to share that with your partner. Take the time to open your heart. There is no space for jealousy or regret in these moments. Be open, take turns, and listen as you learn to engage with the specialness of their story.

Ask each other the following questions:

Can you see yourself in it?
Does the piece make you smile?
What does it mean to you?
How do you feel when you look at it?
Can you see it in our house? Where?
Could it work in a kid's room or secondary home?

Give yourself grace during this process. I was in a relationship for 17 years before my new marriage. Into this new marriage I brought with me art, furniture and elements of my previous home and relationship. These elements had different meanings to me, some anchored in the memories of my children others to a special place I had been. These pieces are part of my story, and I don’t want to let them go. I enjoy speaking about them with our kids, spouse and friends. I want the energy of the art to reflect their beauty and history, and nothing less. In honoring them, you honor yourself.

Give The Art A New Story – Bring It Into the Light

“The owl wants out of the closet,” I said. She had been in there long enough.

There’s a darkness in all of us that needs the balance of light. Something that grounds us and keeps us inspired to do our best work and love in the day-to-day. Our art, stories, and past are part of us—they don’t define us, but they shouldn’t be left in the dark. Talking about them, even if it’s difficult, helps us change our story and shift back into the light. In the light, we can find peace, live in more harmony, and achieve more balance in our homes.

“What if we put her in the powder room,” I suggested. She belongs in a forest, blended with play, mystery and the unexpected. She’s part of your relationship now, where you honor the light and the dark—speaking about all aspects of yourself and each other. A forest and space that you nurture together, reflecting that you will never again face dark times alone.

Before

After

Rewrite the Story of Your Art Together

You never know what may come of your art conversations. Similar questions and conversations can be had about furniture and heirlooms. It’s better to talk about it, shine a light on the process, and create something new with each piece moving forward.

Finding harmony and balance through design and your space will only bring more of that reflection into your relationship.

From a decor and style perspective, bringing a couple into alignment is at the heart of what I am trying to create in a space. Actively listening to preferences, colors, and tastes, reading the energy of the room to find the spark of what is missing. From there, we can start to develop and weave together a new story of who we are in this moment and what we want to create moving forward.

Don’t force it. If something doesn’t energetically lift you or your partner up or make you smile, it’s time to sell it or give it to someone who will appreciate it.

“We really don’t know where to start,” she said, inviting me to go through their home.

Recently purchased, at first glance, this home was the perfect blank canvas. I was there to help integrate this newly blended family from a design perspective. We’ll start with a conversation, asking questions like: How do you want to feel and where do you want to go? Then, we’ll rewrite the story of your space, room by room, until you feel complete.

If you’re feeling stuck, I’m now offering 60-Minute Clarity Calls to help you gain direction, confidence, and fresh design solutions—feel free to share with anyone who might benefit.